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I came across a great article on madamenoire.com that brought up the point: “women tend to forget that dating isn’t just about getting chose. We choose too! — or at least we should be” Read Here

The moral of the article was that as women, we spend so much of our time and energy on “getting chosen” by guys that we forget key elements. We worry grossly about how physically attractive we will be with our hair, clothes and make up on point, that we lose the focus that HE should be impressing US, not just the other way around.

I have always been confident and ambitious, but like countless other women, I too worried about immature things like “Is he going to call me?”, “Is he as into me as I am him?” “Am I good enough?”

Ladies, YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH. YOU’RE JUST DOING IT WRONG. Whether you realize it or not, YOU are always in control. The ENERGY and aura you activate from the start lays the path to you getting what you want. For starters, do not go in desperate.

Dating is like a job interview. You should demonstrate your interest in the position, but you should find out first if this one is the right fit FOR YOU, not only you for them.

Think about the job interview. Experts say you should always go into it with questions of your own to ask a potential employer. Why should you work for their company? Does what they offer fit in line with where you are trying to go? ”

This same tactic should be used with choosing a mate or date. What is so great about them that warrants your time, attention, and money (hair, nails, makeup are not cheap—billion dollar industry). Now of course there is a bit of charm, wit and finesse that go into constructing this conversation, but that’s the smaller part the problem.  As Paul C. Brunson says in his article 5 Ways You’re (Over) Complicating Your Dating Life “you’re probably the #1 culprit in complicating your dating life.”

Here are 3 Things to keep in mind when ‘Choosing’ or presenting yourself to be ‘Chosen’:

 

1. Be Confident! Be Excellent! (In y our mind). If you aren’t feeling yourself who else will?

2. Have some standards. Then see if he matches them.

3. Be Realistic and don’t rule out other options.

Have fun, be open, be safe, and happy dating!