Ok, so, I’m gonna go there and talk about the Maxwell controversy that erupted this past week after the popular soul singer posted pictures on his Instagram of himself cozying up with some European women.
Now this, apparently, isn’t that unusual since Maxwell has posted many pictures of himself posing with white European women during his travels overseas but, this time, some black female fans took issue and let their thoughts be known on his Instagram timeline.
Needless to say, their thoughts were not complimentary, and neither was the singer’s brow-raising response that labeled his critics as “racists” along with a few other choice words.
Well I’m not here to judge Maxwell and I have no clue what his relationships are, nor do I care. Maxwell is a single man who can hang out with – or date – anyone he pleases. Just like any single person of any color can do.
That said, I am also sensitive to the traditional and historical reasons why African-American women are—how should I say—less than enthusiastic about brothers dating outside of our race.
Especially since, in far too many cases, it’s based in self-hatred, a sick and tragic belief, perpetuated by our Western conditioning process, that other races are somehow better than or more valuable than ours.
…that white is right, or that white is a status symbol.
So when we see images of our favorite African-American male stars or sports figures with white women on their arms, all of these sensitivities bubble to the surface whether they apply to the situation or not.
I understand these feelings, but I believe there’s a healthier way of looking at it. You see, we can’t necessarily control who we fall in love with, but we can recognize problematic patterns of behavior.
For example, if a brother happens to fall in love with a white woman, it doesn’t necessarily mean anything other than they love each other. However, if a brotha dates only white women, well there might be something else going on.
The bottom line is this . If your attraction is motivated by true love or friendship, then more power to you. It’s hard enough finding someone to share your life with.
But if your mating rituals are motivated by self-hatred, you should recognize that no woman, white or any color, is going help you get over the lack of value you see in yourself.
Text us at 64-64-64 and tell us how you feel about interracial dating. I’ll leave you with this tragic and telling Old English quote from Robert Burton’s 17th century work, The Anatomy of Melancholy. It simply says:
Thou canst not think worse of me than I do of myself.
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Outside the Race: A Note on Maxwell’s Interracial Dating was originally published on blackamericaweb.com