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black-couple-profeshHow we define success, differs from person to person. But if there is anything most of us ought to know, it’s that the person we’re with can make us better or worse. If you’re a successful woman, you should especially be more attentive to how you choose and who you choose. Because let’s be real, a successful woman as inciting as she can be, can also be perceived as threatening to those around her.

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1. Comfortable in their own skin and with yours.

It can sometimes still feel that if you’re a successful woman, you can come across intimidating to potential mates. Part of being a successful woman I think, is being comfortable in your own skin regardless of how many achievements you have, and not defining yourself by them even when you are proud of them. So the kind of mate you choose must share that perspective with you. And be comfortable enough with who they are to be comfortable enough with who you are.

2. Challenges you to be better.

If you’re successful, chances are you didn’t get there without blood, sweat, and tears. You have drive, you’re always on the move, and you’re always looking to moving forward. As we all should know, we become like the people we choose to be around. And you want someone who wants you to be your very best self in everything. This of course doesn’t mean they always agrees.with you. In fact it means sometimes they don’t. But they are disagreeable in a way that helps your grow.

3. Patient.

Patience is a virtue that far too many people lack, and this is especially true if you’re always used to getting your way. And the truth is a lot of successful women are definitely used to getting their way. My theory is that if you have a patient mate then you are likely to learn how to practice some of that patience too. But more than that, you need someone who understands that sometimes you’re going to get busy, and you need someone who understands that.

4. Financial common sense.

One of the aspects of dating a successful person, and especially a successful woman, is the potential to be threatened by her financial success. There’s a sense that to be successful financially means that you need someone at that same financial level too. The truth is most successful woman don’t need that; what they need is someone who has common sense about their finances, regardless of how much they are making. And enough self-assurance that they don’t feel threatened by it.

5. Someone who always wants to meet you half-way.

If there is anything nobody should have time for, it’s people who bring drama to your life and make you more miserable than happy. And that often comes from feeling like someone is taking more than they are giving. Nobody likes to keep a scorecard on love but if you’re trying too hard for someone, and you don’t see the same effort, they’re probably not the one for you. Look for someone who is always putting effort in, and who is willing to meet you somewhere in the middle.

6. Someone who calms you down.

Success is not without some form of stress, and unfortunately most of us deal with stress by taking it out on our loved ones. Even when most of the time, stress is an indicator that something in our lives is probably out of balance. Either way, successful woman especially, need someone who knows how to calm them down when they go through those high-stress periods. Someone who they can just sit on the couch with after a long hard day and feel like being with them brings peace of mind.

7. Fun.

Sometimes when you’ve got a busy life, it’s really easy to forget that nothing you accomplish is worth it, if you’re not enjoying your life. The biggest success you can achieve in life is just that – a successful life, and that means a life that you want that brings purpose and joy. And there’s nothing better than sharing a successful life with someone with a great sense of humor, who makes your world a lighter place to live in.


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7 Qualities Every Successful Woman Should Look For In A Mate  was originally published on